A letter to Fleche Fencing Supplies

January 22nd, 2011

Safety swords

To whom it may concern at Fleche Fencing Supplies,

If you send me a foam saber, I promise to film a sprawling, epic commercial for your website. We all remember the viral video of that kid practicing his Jedi light saber technique in the privacy of his garage… Why is it that we still remember that video, even to this day? I’ll tell you why: It is entirely because of the awesome power of swords. Swords have the ability to cut the nonsense and get to the point. They endear us with their sharp style and dangerous edginess. The “man of steal” was so named owing to the strength of that common sword material. Even a foam sword excites the simplest of minds. How many times have we gotten lost in the heat of battle, bearing down on our enemy, sword gripped extra tightly in hand to account for excessive sweat, only to be violently brought back to reality when we realize (after the umpteenth blow) that our opponent will not be felled by our foam. We all get carried away sometimes. And doesn’t laughter heal all wounds?

I repeat, send me one small foam saber and I’ll make you the best darned commercial you’ll ever see. I promise it’ll go further (virally) than that Star Wars kid’s little display of “talent”.

You have a foam sword in the stone. I shall be the one to pull it out and wield it with startling business acumen.

Your unlikely knight in foam armour,

Matthew Raudsepp Esq. (Live Action Role Player and internet enthusiast)

*Required, will not be distributed.
*Will be displayed above the comments.