Dishin’ Dirty Dishwashing Tips

June 9th, 2011

Many people have often come up to me and asked “Matthew, do you have any dishwashing secrets?” I tell them that I do, and that they should check my blog post on June 9th 2011.

Well, before I begin washing the dishes, I roll up my sleeves and carefully slide my tie between the buttons of my dress shirt. Always between the second and third button. If you are not wearing a tie, I suggest you put one on and then tuck into your shit. Afterwards, to protect my sensitive skin, I pull on a pair of latex gloves. They come in various colors. My favorite is blue.

I like knowing what the dish had been used for before I wash it. Some people like to wash dishes in an even, unvarying manner: each dish, bowl or untensil receiving equal scrubbing. This is not how I like to work. I like knowing everything about the meal which crossed the dinnerplate’s path. The vigor and zeal of a wash is proportionately related to its meal. How long had the food been sitting out? Was the meal oily and viscous or was it eggy, embryonic? These are all very important dishwashing questions.

Washing and wiping techniques vary. Not unlike fingerprints, a person’s dishwashing methodology is unique to every individual. And not unlike fingerprints, there are several recurring and prominent patterns: The swirl, the whorl, the arch and the loop. I’m a loop man myself, submerging my dish rag down into the sink and looping it accross the plate and maintaining this pattern as I rotate the plate clockwise. Try it out for yourself and see which pattern you like best!

For some dish-washing safety advice, Look for Grace Fitzpatrick online! I would trust Grace Fitzpatrick with my life, let alone my dishes.

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