Pretty Kitty Prick

May 23rd, 2011

Toxoplasma gondii.

Learn to fear that name, for it is the puppetmaster, the black whisper, the dark god.
A parasite. A parasite whose primary host is the common house cat. A parasite that currently infects 40-65% of the world’s human population. 

How? Intermediate hosts. Mostly rodents. Mostly rats.
Infected cat feces are ingested by rats, who in turn become infected. The parasite migrates to the rat brain and changes its behaviour, making the rat less fearful of cats. Infected rodents will seek out cats, get eaten, and Toxoplasma gondii will reproduce, laughing all the while.

Ever clean a litter box, or eat tartare? You’ve probably got Toxoplasmosis. 
And it’s controlling your brain. 

It has the ability to alter human behaviour.
It slows reaction time. It causes men to be more reckless and jealous. It causes greater warmth and conscientiousness in women.
It makes you love cats. Because it wants to get out of you and into them. 

The next time you bend to pet a pretty pussy, know that you might not be doing it of your own free will.

Yours,
Kyle “Cats Domesticated Themselves In Order To Indirectly Enslave Humanity” Gatehouse

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1 Comment

Jane
May 29, 2011
Omg.. I am soooo enslaved