To Dine, Perchance to Dash

April 27th, 2011

Food simply tastes better when it’s stolen. Like sex in public, the adrenaline rush, the possibility of getting caught enhances the flavours of any meal. But dining and dashing is no longer for the hard up. Indeed, only the most sincere food enthusiasts dodge a bill for the sake of flavour.

That being said, you want to find somewhere busy. The waiting staff should be struggling a little bit. This will be tough, because as any diner and/or dasher knows, your waiter or waitress foots your bill when you skip out. But don’t feel bad. A waiter can make up to two hundred dollars in tips a night. That’s not even including their salary. They can afford to pay your dinner (or you and a friend (or friends)).

In fact, sometimes the meal might even taste better the more damaging the crime. Imagine a cozy little family-owned restaurant. Their dishes are prepared with love and warmth. Never in their lives, would they think someone would enjoy their humble cuisine and slink out without paying. Imagine their disenchantment; their faith in humanity dashing out their door beside you. If you’re anything like me, your mouth is watering at the very idea.

Be warned. Stealing from ethnic restaurants is tricky. You don’t know how deftly that Vietnamese sous-chef might wield a throwing knife, nipping you at the ankles on your way out the door. Think about which race would be most likely to poison your food. Is it really worth it? Or maybe that excites you even more…


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1 Comment

Aug 13, 2015
The truth is married couepls from different ethnicities or cultures will always be a problem. I think it's how you handle it,how your spouse handles it, and your parent. My father is Persian, and my mother is Yoruba. My parent come from two completely different and strong cultures, that I'm amazed how they even made it this far, but I know it's through God's grace. It was like hell growing up. It was constant fight from both families, that caused argument between my parent, just like every other relationship. They made a choice to stick to what brought them together in the first place which is the True Love they have for each other. Everywhere, my parent went, people saw them as odd couple. My parent have been married for 30 years and still going strong. My mother even speaks Farsi(Persian language), and my father is trying with his yoruba. My parent tell me all the time, marry whoever you love as long as he's a strong christian, and your best friend, but I'm more atrracted to black guys.